You leave me SPEECHLESS.,

The last day of October.
Finally, it comes to the end.
Bye-bye October.
A wonderful month for me and memories will last forever.

My latest carving ---> Maxi Dress

I hope I could get one for myself soon.

Again, I know I'm vain!

"You leave me SPEECHLESS, when you talk to me."

3:04:00 PM

Finally, I'm back to my own home.
I'm totally run out of energy.
A rest should be taken after this. >.<
A birthday celebration on yesterday (29/10/2008)
First of all, I would like to wish Phui Yee and Pui Yin ---> HAPPY BIRTHDAY

Happy Sweet 20 ~

It has been such a long time I didn't meet up with them.
I enjoy the moments that we have on yesterday.
And I hope I could hang out with you all more often. =)

Memorable pictures:

Me, Ann and The Birthday gurl - Phui Yee

Me and The another Birthday Girl - Pui Yin

Jean, Ming Yi, Me and Moon

Me and Kar Mun

Me, Ann and Jean

Me and Yinly

That' all for today.
I need a rest now.
Ciao~

"You leave me SPEECHLESS, when you talk to me."

6:50:00 PM

4 non Blondes - what's up

Twenty - five years and my life is still
Trying to get up that great big hill of hope
For a destination
And I realized quickly when I knew I should
That the world was made up of this brotherhood of man
For whatever that means
And so I cry sometimes
When I'm lying in bed
Just to get it all out
What's in my head
And I am feeling a little peculiar
And so I wake in the morning
And I step outside
And I take a deep breath and I get real high
And I scream at the top of my lungs
What's going on?
And I say, hey hey hey hey
I said hey, what's going on?
Ooh, ooh ooh
And I try, oh my god do I try
I try all the time, in this institution
And I pray, oh my god do I pray
I pray every single day
For a revolution
And so I cry sometimes
When I'm lying in bed
Just to get it all out
What's in my head
And I am feeling a little peculiar
And so I wake in the morning
And I step outside
And I take a deep breath and I get real high
And I scream at the top of my lungs
What's going on?
And I say, hey hey hey hey
I said hey, what's going on?
Twenty - five years and my life is still
Trying to get up that great big hill of hope
For a destination

* a song that I listen recently, it's nice and I love it very much. The first time I listen this song is when I'm 6 years old. I even can remember all the lyrics on that time. But now, I almost forget it. lol. For sure, it's a very meaningful song for me.

Again, Take it or leave it. =)

"You leave me SPEECHLESS, when you talk to me."

1:23:00 PM

周杰伦 - 给我一首歌的时间词：周杰伦曲：周杰伦
★ 尛維尼制作
放飞心情
雨淋湿了天空
毁得很讲究
你说你不懂
为何在这时牵手
我晒干了沉默
悔得很冲动
就算这是做错
也只是怕错过
在一起叫梦
分开了叫痛
是不是说
没有做完的梦最痛
迷路的后果
我能承受
这最后的出口
在爱过了才有
能不能给我一首歌的时间
紧紧的把那拥抱变成永远
在我的怀里你不用害怕失眠
哦如果你想忘记我也能失忆
能不能给我一首歌的时间
把故事听到最后才说再见
你送我的眼泪
让它留在雨天
哦越过你划的线
我定了勇气的终点
雨淋湿了天空
毁得很讲究
你说你不懂
为何在这时牵手
我晒干了沉默
悔得很冲动
就算这是做错
也只是怕错过
在一起叫梦
分开了叫痛
是不是说
没有做完的梦最痛
迷路的后果
我能承受
这最后的出口
在爱过了才有
能不能给我一首歌的时间
紧紧的把那拥抱变成永远
在我的怀里你不用害怕失眠
哦如果你想忘记我也能失忆
能不能给我一首歌的时间
把故事听到最后才说再见
你送我的眼泪
让它留在雨天
哦越过你划的线
我定了勇气的终点
你说我不该不该
不该在这时候说了我爱你
要怎么证明我没有说谎力气
请告诉我暂停算不算放弃
我只有一天的回忆
能不能给我一首歌的时间
紧紧的把那拥抱变成永远
在我的怀里你不用害怕失眠
哦如果你想忘记我也能失忆
能不能给我一首歌的时间
把故事听到最后才说再见
你送我的眼泪让它留在雨天
哦越过你划的线
我定了勇气的终点
你说我不该不该
不该在这时候说了我爱你
要怎么证明我没力气
可是我只有一天的回忆
你说我不该不该
不该在这时候才说爱你
要怎么证明我没力气
我只有一天的回忆

"You leave me SPEECHLESS, when you talk to me."

7:44:00 AM

1. What's your ambition ?
Song writer because I love music than nobody does. =)

2. Who is more important to you ? friend or boy/girlfriend ?
At this moment I will say my friends because I don't have a boyfriend yet. LOL

3. How often do you think of committing suicide ?
I use to think that when I'm still young and I tell myself to try it for every year on my birthday.

4. Do you think you have enough confidence ?
Nope but I know I'm gaining.

5. How many babies you want ?
I never thought of having baby but I would like to have one if my husband want it. LOL

6. Do you believe in seeing rainbow after the rain ?
Definitely yes and I always waiting for my miracle.

7. What is your goal for this year ?
Slim down.

8. Do you believe in eternity love ?
Nope, never.

9. What's a perfect girlfriend/boyfriend like to you ? ( List 10 )
- Sweet
- Caring
- Independent yet dependent
- Always give me surprises
- Must be taller than me. At least 180cm above LOL
- Accept all my weakness
- Let me eat whatever I want and never ask me to slim down.
- Love me in every way
- Humour
- Smart?

10. What feeling do you love most ?
Every morning when I wake up

11. What is you bad habit ?
Loud.

12. Is there anything you wanna tell the people who hates you ?
Don't ever try to mess up with me. I dare you!

13. Do you cherish every single friendship of yours ?
Sure and I love them too.

14. What does flying means to you ?
When I get my freedom.

15. What do you crave for the most currently ?
No more loneliness

16. List 3 most important person in your life ?
- My family
- My friends
- For the person who willing to spent his entire life with me. LoL

17. What is the most wonderful moment that you want to share with your love one?
Every moment.

18. What have you done to yourself make yourself happy ?
I never make myself happy.

19. What will you become in another 10 years to come ?
A corporate woman who driving her BMW. Wahaha

20. What is your lucky number ?
13. Don't ask me why.

I have no idea who I should tag. So, can I skip that part?

"You leave me SPEECHLESS, when you talk to me."

12:19:00 AM

Good night to everyone.
11.36 pm
Again, I'm here to start my 115th post in blog spot.
I couldn't believe myself actually having so much of entries in blog spot.
I'm kinda hard working sometimes but unfortunately not for my studies.
I wish I could do that on my studies as well.
For sure, a good result shouldn't be any problem for me anymore.
What I should write for my this post?
My current life? Nope, it's too boring.
My friends? Nope, not anymore. I'm too sick of talking about them.
My parents? Well, I should admit that I do not know my parents very well.
Sometimes I will say that they love me so much, they try to give me everything that I need. Okie, come this to point, you all may assume that my parents might be the good and wonderful parents in this world.
Ya, maybe they are but sometimes I do hate them.
I know I shouldn't use the "hate" word. Never hate your parents no matter what they have do because they are your parents.
I understand the theory but it doesn't mean I must obey it.
I have my own thinking and I know what I'm doing.
You must think that I'm a bad daughter or what-so-ever.
But there is something that you will never understand and you will never know how I feel because you're not in my situation.
I love them too but not the 100 percent love.
Because I care myself more than anyone.
I still remember when I'm still young, my grandma used to ask who is the person I love the most.
That time I only 4 years old and my answer is myself.
I love myself than nobody does.
You will think I'm a selfish person and never care about the others.
I don't mind you say I'm a selfish person and I admit that I am, so what?
When no one is going to love or appreciate me, I think I should be the one who do that to myself.

I don't want be the most pathetic person in this world.
(Even I know I'm on my way to be that person.)
I know who treat me good and who are not.
I also know who are the fakers but I just pretend that I don't know.
If you're trying to fool me please make sure that I'm stupid enough to let you do so.
Some of my friends ask me whether I'm a drama queen.
Seriously, I don't know whether I am or not.
Sometimes, I admit that I'm acting but sometimes I'm not.
Whatever it is, I'm not going to do anything to harm you so please don't worry about that.
I'm might not be sincere for all the time, but when I'm not treating you sincerely, I'm sure that I know you're acting.
If you want to act in front of me so do I, and I will do the same thing to you.
I'm a Libra ~ians.
Everything about me must be fair enough, if I know you are not doing fair with me.
So sorry, I will do the same thing to you.

Every morning when I wake up, I look around and I listen.
I'm alone, and I hear silence.
And slowly but surely a happiness spreads through my body.
A joy.
And I should thank God that somehow, I've managed to remain free.
Free to enjoy my life.
Nothing is better to be free.
So much of being a woman is telling lies, isn't it?
It's telling yourself that you want the things that society tells you you should want.
Women think that survival depends on conformity.
But for some of the women, conformity is death.
It's a death to the soul.
The soul should be a precious thing.
When you live a lie, you damage the soul.

I'm living in a lie and I know I have damaged my soul.

Johnson

"You leave me SPEECHLESS, when you talk to me."

11:36:00 PM

Lipstick Jungle

Just bought it this afternoon.
It actually has been shown in TV series.
I have watch few episodes and I found it interesting.
Okie, I will start my 1st chapter on today.

Will be back ~

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO BLUEY!

"You leave me SPEECHLESS, when you talk to me."

1:25:00 AM

Another un-sleep-able night.
Don't worry not having any insomnia problems.
I'm just rushing my assignments.
That 's all
Waiting my team-mate to send me her works.
I don't know when I started become so patient.
Seriously I not even get mad when she tells me she can't finish it.
Ya, I know I'm on my way to be good.
Is this the so -called good personality that everyone should have or I'm the most stoo-pid dumb dumb in the world who never think of getting angry?
Again, maybe not for this time.
I'm too lazy to be angry.
And I have enough for that emotion.
Or maybe this is the only attitude that I can react to the others.
" Always be nice, no matter what happens"

I'm a faker.
Back off, faker!
I really don't know what I am doing.
I feel doubt, miserable, confuse and etc.
You won't understand what I'm struggling.
I'm kinda confuse what I'm doing.
I hate faker but I'm the big fat liar who always tell people not to be a faker, pretender or what-so-ever.
Whenever something happens, I'm like a coward who hiding under my mom skirt and looking for someone to help me.
Sometimes I don't even how to say the "No" words.
It's kinda pathetic for me.
Ya, this is me.
I'm not the Stephanie that you think I suppose to be.
Disappointed?
I guess so.
After all, I think you will say I'm a loser.
Yes, I am.
And I can't help.

I hate you.
This is what I want to tell her.
Can you please stay away from me.
Another sentence that I want to tell her.
I have enough, It's not fun to see you acting for all the time.
We all know who you are and you can stop acting.
Just be who you are.
Seriously, maybe that will makes us feel more comfortable instead of guessing who you are.

"You leave me SPEECHLESS, when you talk to me."

3:55:00 AM

Same mistakes shouldn't be done twice.

"You leave me SPEECHLESS, when you talk to me."

8:51:00 PM

Once upon an October

Memories that will last forever in my mind.
Thanks for makes me feel complete.
And I really mean it.
2008 will be a memorable year for me.

When the curtain falls, I still wish to be with you all ~

"You leave me SPEECHLESS, when you talk to me."

11:58:00 PM

A hectic encounter.
As you know tons of assignments are waiting for me and I haven finish any of them.
I'm kinda worry but I'm so sick of doing it.
Sue me! >.<
My sister keeps on remind me about my assignments whenever I'm watching TV or lying on the bed doing nothing.
Thanks for reminding me. =P
Even it doesn't help much for giving up my entertainment.
Stephanie is still Stephanie, nothing can stop her!
Monday looks so blue to me and I'm feeling blue now.
Waiting for raining. =)
When the rain comes, I will just put myself on bed and SLEEP~
Listening to a song named "At the beginning" - soundtracks from Anastasia.
Nice but makes me feel sleepy.
Don't know why.
Life is miserable.
Friends are complicated.
Stephanie is unpredictable.
Holidays is wonderful.
Assignments is tiring ~

After few hours....

I'm back...
Assignments still not yet finish
Having headache now...
Feel like knocking my head towards the wall and let myself die.
I hate words.
I'm stuck with my assignments.
I have no more words to write.
I'm freaking exhausted now.
I need a rest.
Can I?
The rain is over and I haven sleep yet.
Argh~
Is time to back to my assignments again.
Hate it.
How many nights I still need to spend to finish this damn bloody hell assignments!

"You leave me SPEECHLESS, when you talk to me."

12:56:00 PM

A wonderful Sunday? Hrmm, maybe. It's hard to believe that Me, myself, Stephanie actually takes part in a charity big walk. I'm so sleepy and even think of not going for the walk.

Okie, it's for charity and not a competition so no people will going to win it even though they be the first person who finish the walk. Me? Okie, it's unexpectedly I finish it within 40 minutes even though it's only 4.5 km. Please give a big clap for me by spending my wonderful time with doing charity (Actually my lecture force us to take part in this charity walk to gain extra marks). I think it's okie for me even my legs is painful and I do think myself need some exercises.

Random pictures:

my back side

me, Theng and Bluey ( I never looks good with spec)

Darren and I

Chyihann and I (bad hair day)

Me and the cool girl - Bluey

Me -Stephanie ( I'm tired)

The house of bunny is funny.
The Bimbo is damn stoo-pid but she is pretty and attractive.
Guys prefer a Bimbo to be their girlfriend?
Maybe.
But I rather to be an intelligent girl.
I never want to be a Bimbo and I don't think I'm qualify for that.

Ciao~

"You leave me SPEECHLESS, when you talk to me."

11:41:00 PM

I'm officially 20 years old now.
This will be a very long post.
After having my three days birthday celebration, I think is time for me to back to normal.
I'm happy for having a very wonderful birthday celebration.
Again, thanks a lot! You will never know how I feel and it's indescribable. I love you all. Muacks! Is nice to have you all as my friends.

Memorable pictures:

all of us

my present

my 200 bucks

the girls

me and the boys

benny and me

my two lovely friends- eve and bluey

my presents

me and benny

me and yann yun

me and my birthday planner - How Theng

Two pretty girls - Bluey and Yann Yun

6 of us

Me and Ann

My presents:

My miracle from my daddy

My birthday cakes from my mummy

Anna Sui Lip color duo from Moon

Inside

The cover

My bath buddies from my sis, Rachel

My Billa bong cap

My Dorothy Perkins waist belt

My dinner

My two basic tee- from Dorothy Perkins

Necklace from Diva - Charmane

My birthday card with signatures

My birthday card

My present box

You think I'm showing off? Definitely I'm doing that. Don't envy me for having a bunch of friends treating me so good. I love my friends =)
I want to say thank you to Moon and Ann for the lunch.
I have a wonderful time with them and they make me feel warm in this birthday.
Of course, last and not least, my Segi friends - Mr. Chan, Miss B, Benny, Eve and ah Giap, Chyihann and Yann Yun as well.

I get an expected call from a friend and I'm glad that he still remember my birthday.
You know who you are.
Thanks for all the wishes that I receive from my friends.
You all make me feels complete in this birthday.

My memorable birthday.
No more lonely feeling for this birthday.
I have my miracle and I hope all of you will get one too.

The end

"You leave me SPEECHLESS, when you talk to me."

9:49:00 PM